ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand

her at all.

Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more

willing to die.

Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's no use in two people

remembering the same thing.

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change,and she does.

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the begining of a new argument.

There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a woman -

before marriage and after marriage.